If You Forgot to Buy Dad a Present for Father's Day...

B'SD

26 Sivan 5769

If he's old enough to be your father, then he might be facing some medical issues by now. Make life easier for him. Present Dad, and even your grandfather, with leads to lots of solutions to their medical problems.

This Sunday will be Father's Day. If you don't have a present for the major man in your life, here's an easy solution:

Ask for fast delivery when you buy Poppa a copy of "It's MY Crisis! And I'll Cry if I Need To: A Life Book that Helps You to Dry Your Tears and to Cope with a Medical Challenge."





Hmmm, you're feeling stressed that you forgot to buy the gifts earlier. OK, buy them directly from the publisher.

To your good health,

Yojeved Golani
Coping with a Medical Crisis?
Make the Changes You Need in Your Life

How To Spell Coping Mechanisms? R-E-S-P-E-C-T

9 Sivan 5768

I'm tossing in a bonus post for Father's Day. Many of the men in my life have been models of magnificent compassion and insight. Here's my salute to you, and to my own father (may his memory be for a blessing):

Some of my blog and book readers plus my Self-Help Coaching clients ask me for a quick explanation of my coping mechanisms. I can answer academically (I use various tools proven by time), but the true, better answer comes with your personal experience at coping. A person growing in coping competence knows, in their gut, what it feels like to fail to cope and what it feels like to succeed at coping. And they learn to admit those feelings to themselves and to critically important others in their life.

Here's the rest of my "Quickie" explanation of coping mechanisms:

NAME YOUR FEELING (including the ugly, embarrassing ones) or the feeling of the distressed person speaking with you. That makes it more “real.” Now you can deal with it.

CONVERSE ABOUT THE FEELING(S) with the caring person(s) involved in your life. Seek sensible strategies for managing the situation before you and/or the emotions popping up with that situation. Your increasing Self-Awareness can clue you in to your gut reactions (your completely honest initial response to anything at all). Go with your gut! If the decision you’ve made feels right, your tummy will feel calm and spread calmness throughout your body. If the decision is NOT good for you, you’ll feel the trouble. Cancel THAT decision!

RESPECT YOURSELF AND OTHERS. When you’re dialoguing about conflicting, mysterious emotions, don’t insult yourself or anyone else by remarking "Well, what do I know? I'm so stupid," “That’s not true!” or “No, you don’t know what you’re talking about (see my book’s opening remarks for a superb example about that problem).” Dismissive remarks are brutal. If you "Diss" yourself, your self-esteem eventually hits below bottom. What can happen when you reject someone else's thoughts? The victim of the insult will probably stop sharing honest thoughts with you, lie to you (honesty obviously doesn't matter anymore), and suffer more because the solution-oriented conversation died at birth.

REACT WITH RESPECT (genuine respect). That keeps the dialogue going (plus the relationship!). The solution can soon follow.

ZIP YOUR LIPS. The human brain needs an editor. Not all thoughts deserve to be said aloud or acted upon. Plan your remarks and your behavior. Learn to be silent as you consider your next sentence and/or action. See above paragraph ;^ )

SEEK OUT learned opinions and PEOPLE WITH PRODUCTIVE EXPERIENCES. Let them guide you as necessary.

The moment you feel elevated by your efforts, you'll know you've surpassed your previous limitations. You've grown as a person. It's a spiritual experience. That can take you to a whole 'nuther level of coping: Bringing GOD into your life ;^ )

Relationships can improve and sweeten as everyone around you learns that you embrace them, and yourself, with honesty and acceptance. Some folks will need more time than others to become comfortable with the new you. Allow them time to adjust. You'll both be happier for it.

There's more to the world of coping mechanisms, of course. But the best-laid plans and good intentions MUST turn into hard work if you want to realize RESULTS! Read my book and find out what some other coping mechanisms are. The "Suggested Reading List" in my book's "Resource" section provides more clues to managing emotions.

To your good health,

Yojeved Golani
Coping with a Medical Crisis?
Make the Changes You Need in Your Life.

Another Reader Inspired by My Writings and My Advice to Adopt a Purposely Positive Point of View!

9 Sivan 5768

How much impact can my book and/or blog have on someone's life? Check out this just-arrived message from a reader (name omitted for privacy protection) using one of my nicknames:

"Hi Yo-yo,

I did a little research on Cranio Sacral Therapy at your suggestion and found two places in my area that perform this. I realize it is a several month commitment, and then they adjust to your needs. I have felt a bit "stuck" these past few years, and I really like that there is a mind, body, spirit component. It sounds to me like a win-win situation, either way! Something I could really benefit from.

Now, here is why I felt a need to write to you as someone who has tried this and really knows the benefit of having CST. As I mentioned in my earlier post, I need to have surgery again after 8 years. The thing I keep hearing from my old NS, and now my new NS is that there is concern of scar tissue, and the hard "eraser like quality" that my tumor had. My old NS doubts there would be a change in the consistency of the tumor. And my new NS said he thinks if there are any problems it would be from the hardening of the scar tissue and of course, as I already know the hardness of the original tumor. So, here is my question to you. If you had several months to detox your body, and incorporated CS Therapy before having your surgery, do you think it could help create the fluid it needs to release some of that bulid-up, hard, plaque like substance that could potentially make this tricky surgery even more risky? Something is telling me it could. But, I don't know enough about this first hand to make that judgment. I know you can't tell me what to do, but perhaps you have some insight or knowledge you can share that could guide me on this amazing journey I am now on.

Monday, I met w/ Dr. ____, who is in _____, and ... he is proposing two surgeries. One endoscopic, and then an eyebrow craniotomy to get to the upper portion if need be. Oh, how I do not want to have the craniotomy again! I trust he knows what he's talking about, but in my haste to want this to get moving, I scheduled the first surgery for two weeks from now...

So, my question is, do you think it is worth having the extra time to continue the self healing I have begun and to try CS Therapy to, in a sense, help Dr. ___, so when he gets in there, I will be helping the process on another level, I would like to know if this is what you would do, knowing now what you know.

I really value your input on this Yojeved, as you are the one who opened my mind to this from thousands of miles away!

Thank you, and God Bless! ____"

Rest assured that I informed the writer of multiple and wonderful mind/spirit/body possibilities. I definitely advocated for Cranio Sacral Therapy and other self-healing techniques before and after her surgery.

One of the things I've learned, as a Self-Help Coach and as a patient, is that a PURPOSELY POSITIVE POINT OF VIEW can promote healing far into the future and far beyond the Western Medical World's usual expectations. Look at the recent photo of me standing in a garden months after doctors expected to amputate my badly broken arm following a devastating accident (my fracture was further complicated by the short-lived development of RSD/CRPS) and years after I was expected to go permanently blind. I use both pain-free hands/arms and I see exactly what I'm doing every day.

Not a bad result for Positive Thinking and Behaving, hmmm?

Readers, here's My Advice to YOU:
Develop a PURPOSELY POSITIVE POINT OF VIEW.
Open your body/spirit/mind to healing potential.
Watch what happens.
The intention to heal can promote healing on its own.
Let it.

Afraid you can't possibly become positive about your medical situation? FAKE IT!

Keep faking until you actually feel upbeat. Make Happiness your new habit. Re-read that letter above and read between the lines. She's going forward very consciously. YOU can, too! Buy my book and learn how. The medical and mental health therapists who praised it on the cover agree: I teach something that works!

And, uh, guess who wrote the dedication to my book? Answer: my amazed Cranio Sacral Therapist. She witnessed my remarkable progress past medical hurdles.

THIS SUNDAY IS FATHER'S DAY! Buy Dad, Grandpa, or any guy you know in a medical crisis a copy of my book. Remember the important men in your life with a gift that could become important to them ;^ )

To your good health,

Yojeved Golani
Coping with a Medical Crisis?
Make the Changes You Need in Your Life