29 Cheshvan, 5779
I read an "Is my friend depressed?" question in a facebook forum for medically compromised people. The friend in question had experienced recent brain surgery to remove a tumor. The after-effects had damaged his hearing, memory, and ability to move easily. He rested rather often, asking to be excused from visitors. The person in the medical forum wanted to know if that indicated depression.
I was appalled at the person's ignorance. It was inexcusable, considering today's accessibility to ample medical information that can educate people who read the literature or listen to the videos. I was alarmed to realize how many people might overlook all that, and, like the questioner, make very, very incorrect assumptions that can lead to actual harm for the patient involved.
Please read my response to the person, and take it to heart as I pray you will. Anyone who takes the actions advised within the message will be heroic, preventing harm and fostering healing, happiness, and accurate appreciation for specific realities:
"I'm writing as a Health Information Management professional and medical/mental health journalist and as a survivor of 5 meningiomas:
He is not suffering from depression, not even giving more than one possible sign of it. You, however, need an education on healing processes and neurological damage, let alone invisible illnesses. Your friend is experiencing all of that.
It's unreasonable that the US medical medical world fails to educate family members about the consequences of neurological surgery. At minimum there should be informational posters in waiting rooms and medical offices, brochures in the hallways, and informational get-togethers run by the hospital. You can request all that of the hospital administrators, beginning with the PR and neurosurgery departments. Your eventual success can help many, many people.
Did you ever ask questions of the medical team instead of medically naive strangers on social media? Have you read books or any literature about the effects of brain surgery and what healing processes entail? That can prove very helpful.
By assuming incorrect conclusions about what ails someone, you can seriously damage their self confidence and self image. They will believe that the world perceives them as weirdos and that their coping plus communication efforts are pointless. Clarify facts instead of assuming anything. Look for the hero within. Praise a person for persevering against setbacks. You've shown us that you are compassionate. Compliment your concern with sensible behavior that helps your friend. You can do so much to help him, and other people, to thrive that way."
PS - Dear blog readers, please share the link to this post with medical professionals. Every medical department in hospitals, rehabilitation centers, and private offices would serve their clientele by providing the sort of information cited above.
Many birthing centers provide educational classes for prospective parents. That educational model can be used for every form of illness and recovery effort within the medical world.
Advocate for yourselves and for other people who can't. Coax medical professionals to inform the public. We need to know facts in order to promote healing and to prevent the harm that ignorance can cause.
Want to cope with medical and/or mental health problems, including the expenses for your care? Buy the E-book or print edition of EMPOWER Yourself to Cope with a Medical Challenge.
Face Your Medical Problems with Dignity. Face Your Future with Optimism.
Fill your mind with facts, not fiction!
