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Wednesday, January 29, 2014

How to Stop a Pedophile


28 Shvat, 5774

Sexual molestation of children is a soul-ripping hell.

The defenseless victims are often too young or too much in shock and horror to find the words that explain what was done to them. 

Caring, compassionate adults are morally obligated to protect children from sex predators and anyone who wants to harm them. The predators can be male or female, relatives, teachers, camp counselors, youth group leaders, neighbors and anybody else. 

Those same compassionate adults are morally obligated to provide the child ith effective therapy for getting past the trauma, perhaps several sexual molestation traumas.

I began to report about innovative programs to help the victims of child molesters and programs to prevent molesters from hurting more people back in 1996, when Nefesh Israel ( launched such activities.

I attended a relevant program last week: 

I'd like to share an E-mail exchange between me and Dr Pelcovitz. It can educate you:

"If I recall correctly Dr Pelcovitz, you explained that interviewed perverts rationalize that their young victims are too young to remember the abuse foisted on them. 

I find that lie easy to expose: Do the perverts recall when they were first, or ever, molested? Yes, they do. Those memories are intact. 

Why not confront them with their lie? If they've been confronted with the inconsistency, do they re-rationalize their behavior? What is the lesson for society, in 50 words or less?

I request that you provide your listeners with

1) Handouts describing the body language and personality characteristics of perverts

2) Please remind me of the researcher who discovered that fMRIs reveal the shutdown of language centers during sexual and other trauma. I suspect that the reality could force a change in halacha regarding victims who do not scream for help.

I'm hoping you recall that I wrote about your groundbreaking work for the Jewish - and wider - communities in The Jewish Press, back in 1996 or so, when Nefesh Israel held its kenes (YG: convention) in Baltimore. I believe the event was labeled 'Shhh... It's Not a Secret Anymore.'" 

Dr Pelcovitz quickly replied , "I couldn't agree more. We do confront them.  That is the essence of their problem and the nature of that component of therapy.- they lie to themselves and it's the job of the therapist to uncover this and challenge them. 

Handouts are a good idea for future programs. The researcher I was referring to is Dr Bessel van der Kolk."

Readers, I recommend that you see a most appropriate definition of sexual abuse by Israel's Takana organization, at

The home page of Takana is

The organization helps people 
of all ages and
educational materials 
for use in schools, camps 
and youth groups. 

Ask for them.

The site is available in Hebrew at

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